Pixie Dust
by EvilQueen2015
Summary: "What I want to do, is make you see some things...but most of all I just want to take away the darkness and the ability to hurt people." She seemed to think about what she just said and I rolled my eyes. "Or other creatures. There's so many things that I don't want you to do anymore and I think I know just the way."
1. Chapter 1

_This writing bug...I've been working on this for the past two days and I'm already working on the sixth chapter so I'm going to try and finish this as fast as I can without losing quality._

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Ironic, isn't it?

I stayed behind to make sure that Tinkerbell didn't know I was in the island, only to get caught by her as I was waiting on Emma. Her words were still ringing in my head, and I tried my best not to let the memories assault my brain.

Emma was the savior but I sure wasn't going to let her words get to me.

Tinkerbell had heard my conversation with Emma and it made her angry. Which in turn, made me angry.

After she told me I was going to fail, Tinkerbell knocked me out with something, it took me by surprise even though I should've known she had something up her sleeve.

I woke up lying on the ground, cold, hard and above all, dirty. My head was pounding and as I took note of my surroundings I realized my hands were tied behind my back.

I tried to sit up, but there was a blinding pain behind my eyes and I groaned as I shut them tightly. "About time you woke up. I've been looking forward to this chat for quite some time."

I sighed as I pushed past the pain to sit up. "Look, you don't know why I'm here."

"Oh, I know exactly why you're here," she said even before the last syllable leaves my mouth. "You're here to find your son." Her anger at me made me realize that I wasn't as safe as I wanted to be.

"I take it by the restraints, you're not helping," I said after a dry chuckle. My head was pounding as I looked at the woman sitting in front of me. The anger rolled off of her tense body in waves and I couldn't blame her.

"Hell no. You're the last person I'd ever help, after how you burned me."

Even through the pounding in my head that seemed unfair. "Burned you?" I asked indignant. "You're the one who interfered in _my_ life."

"And threw away my own in the process!"

"So what do you want from me? To kill me?" I asked, my mask sliding on along with a smirk that covered up my fear. Sure, I had magic and she didn't seem to have any left by the looks of her. "You think it's that easy?" I moved around a little, trying to figure out what she could have used to knock me out. "Whatever you've knocked me out with, it's not magic. Maybe poppies." The look on her face tells me enough as I move to my knees. "Since you had to resort to that, I know you don't have magic...but I do." I magic away the restraints as I stood to my feet.

She moves quickly I had to give her that. "Yea, I know," she said as she held an arrow against my throat. "But even your magic can't stop this. Ever hear of dreamshade?"

My heart was pounding in my chest at the mention of the deadly poison. "Yes."

"Good."

I looked at her then, and thought back to the girl I'd met. There was nothing left of that girl. "How the hell did you get like this?"

"I met you," She snarled back at me. There was murder in her eyes and fear in my heart, and then nothing.

"You want to kill me? Well, don't let the poison do it," I gritted just before I reached into my chest and pulled my heart out. Under her protest. "Go ahead, crush it!"

"You think I won't?"

Her eyes were frantic and it told me that no, she wouldn't crush it even if she wanted to get rid of me. "Oh, I'm counting on it. Show me who you are, Tinkerbell."

I knew goading someone who was really close to actually wanting to hurt you wasn't the best thing one could do.

She grabbed my heart, squeezing just a little and giving me the feeling someone was standing on my chest.

I stared at my heart, still hating the way it was colored and then back up at Tinkerbell. The fairy had all control over me but she didn't know what to do with it.

Or so I thought.

"I actually don't want to kill you," the blonde fairy said before she - accidentally - squeezed my heart a little. The pressure on my chest made me gasp. "I mean, you cost me so much." She shrugged and I realized what exactly I had cost her, but I kept quiet. A fairy was proud of her wings, and when they were taken away they felt like they were nothing. "But, you deserve to live with that knowledge and the other stuff you did…"

"Stop putting pressure on it, if you're not planning on killing me," I breathed out and she widened her eyes in surprise before opening her hand and almost dropping my heart. "Careful!"

"What I want to do, is make you see some things...but most of all I just want to take away the darkness and the ability to hurt people." She seemed to think about what she just said and I rolled my eyes. "Or other creatures. There's so many things that I don't want you to do anymore and I think I know just the way."

"Well, this sounds interesting. And I would be impressed if you were able to do as you say and take the darkness away."

"Oh, I sure am. Also, I'm able to do so much more than take the darkness away. I am capable of so much more now that I have some pixie dust. All I have to do is think of what I want!" She looked excited and I rolled my eyes.

"Well, I wish you luck." I smirked at her, knowing that even though pixie dust was strong, it was not strong enough to take anything away. "It's going to be one hell of a ride."

"That's not even the hard part. What is, is to tell you that you were actually right and the person in that bar wasn't your True Love." Tink looked down and I frowned at her.

What was she talking about? "He was, I was just afraid to go in and meet him," I told Tink for the second time today.

"No but that's where you're wrong. Your True Love is here on the island with us and I will show you who it is. There's no denying then."

"What am I denying, fairy?" I snapped as she looked down at my heart as if she had planned this all along.

"There'll be no denying what you want," Tink said with a smile. I rolled my eyes but didn't dare to say anything to make her want to hurt me again. I was...content with her holding my heart if she didn't squeeze it again.

"I know what I want; I want you to leave me alone. From what I understand is that you do not plan on it," I raised an eyebrow and smirked at her. "The fact of the matter is, the only people here on this island are Pan and his Lost Boys, Snow, David and Emma. None of them are my True Love."

"How are you so sure?"

"I just am," I replied. For some reason, if any of those people had been my True Love I'd have known. "I'm not stupid Tink. David and Snow are together and happy, Emma is mourning her loss even though she won't let it show. I'll be damned if Pan or Rumple or any of those children are my True Love. So that leaves you, and I don't feel much love for you and from what I see, you feel the same way."

"Oh yea it's not me," she said with a grin before she seemed to figure out how to get this show started. She turned, and I could practically feel the whisper against my heart.

The pixie dust that settled on my heart.

The sudden and inexplicable hope that I felt.

And then the fairy turned back to me and handed me my heart back. She didn't say a word as she looked from my heart to me and back. But then she turned, leaving me with my heart in my hand.

I stood there in silence a moment longer before I gently pushed my heart back into my chest, noting something was different but choosing to ignore it for the sake of finding my son.

As I walked out of whatever it was Tinkerbell had brought me to, I thought about all she had said.

Maybe she was right, and the man with the lion tattoo wasn't my True Love. Maybe someone else was, and maybe they were on the island with us.

I didn't know everyone on the island. I didn't know if there were other people, other adults on the island.

And so there was my first warning - the hope that I'd find someone to be happy with, other than my son who, last I knew, didn't even like me. It shouldn't have been there, it hadn't been there before.

But I paid it no mind as I heard something behind me. I tensed up, even though my magic had been less than stable as of late and this felt like a threat that I couldn't actually handle.


	2. Chapter 2

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"Show yourself." I was glad that my voice was steady even though I felt shaky enough. Ever since the Cannery I'd been a bit shaky, not feeling like I had control over my magic just yet. Or, my emotions.

"Regina? I've been looking all over for you," Emma's voice reached me first and after about thirty seconds, she came into my view. The relief that I heard surprised me, and the relief that I _felt_ surprised me even more.

"I...I was reacquainting myself with someone I knew a long time ago." My heart skipped a beat at the worry in her eyes and I wondered what was happening, that I was reacting in such a way to whatever I saw in Emma's eyes.

"Are you okay?" She looked at me then, really looked at me. Checked me from head to toe, looking for what I assume was any wound that could've been inflicted. "You're still kind of we-uh, recovering from what Greg did to you."

"I'm well aware Miss Swan," I said, raising one eyebrow. It felt fake though, everything I did seemed and felt studied. I rubbed at my chest, still feeling my own hand reaching in for my heart. "I'm fine, though."

"What happened?" She asked as she stepped closer. "Let's walk and talk, we need to get back to Snow and Charming."

"An...old friend found me," I said as I fell into step with Emma. "Tinkerbell...she knocked me out with some kind of drug. Natural I believe, not magical because I'd feel something like that."

Emma turned her head toward me in disbelief. "Tinkerbell? As in the fairy?" She shook her head and then took a deep breath. "I should've known."

"You should've known what?"

"That she would be here, of course. She is in Peter Pan the fairy tale." Emma chuckled dryly before looking at me again and indicating for me to carry on with my tale.

I fell into step with Emma as we made our way to the camp we'd set up. "She brought me to a cave of sorts and tried...I don't even know what she tried. She had an arrow with dreamshade," I shook my head, trying to figure out still, what the fairy had meant with everything she'd said. "I gave her my heart. It would be quicker than the poison. Told her to crush it."

"Jeez, Regina! What if she did crush it?" Emma's displeasure was clear.

"Then you'd have one less problem," I replied with a smirk and then sighed. "Listen, I've been alive for long enough to learn how to read people and their intentions and not everyone is capable of crushing a heart just like that."

"You got lucky," Emma muttered and I smiled. Yes, I got lucky that Tink didn't want to crush my heart.

"I did get lucky."

* * *

Food was something else on Neverland. Though they found rabbits and had enough edible plants, I scowled at the stew that Snow had made.

"Are you sure this is...okay to eat?" Emma asked, echoing my thoughts. I looked up just in time to see Snow sigh and nod her head.

"I know how to cook a stew, Emma. After all, I've lived in the Enchanted Forest and I survived." She seemed hurt by the doubt in Emma's eyes and I felt a sudden pang of…something.

I really needed to figure out what exactly Tinkerbell had done to my heart because the feelings I was feeling weren't any of the feelings I'd been feeling for the past few decades.

"There's only one way to find out," I said as I lifted the wooden spoon to my mouth. I blew but more to stall than because it was still hot, and then took the bite. It actually wasn't that bad, but I'd never had this kind of food before so I had to get used to the tastes. "Not too bad."

Emma took this as a sign that she could start eating and while at first she was careful and only took little bites, when she got a taste of it she started eating with gusto.

There were changes to me, I noticed, but they were small, and it made me wonder what would happen if I let those changes take over. I still didn't know who Tinkerbell had meant was my True Love, but I was sure I'd find out soon enough.

The night went by without anything strange happening though and I was just grateful for the time to figure out how to get Henry away from Pan. We talked, and talked and talked until Snow yawned and rubbed her eyes, and Charming made the decision to end the day.

Snow and Charming went to bed, and while my head was pounding and my entire body begged me to do the same, I turned to Emma.

"You have magic in you that's in need of being tamed," I said, watching very carefully what she would do. She simply nodded and sighed before rubbing the back of her neck. "Would you like to start doing that?"

"Damn right," she muttered before she stood to her feet. "But I'm not sure it's smart to…practice anything in the dark. We don't know what could happen."

I took a deep breath. "Well, then. You're probably right, and we both need our energy if we want to save Henry." For some reason, my heart skipped a beat when she smiled at me and I almost smiled back.

But that wasn't how I did things. I licked my suddenly dry lips and stood, wiping my jeans to keep my hands busy. That wasn't how I was supposed to be doing things.

"Goodnight Regina," Emma said softly and my hands started shaking as I looked up at her. What was happening to me?

"Goodnight, Miss Swan," I said with a nod of my head before I turned, and created enough distance between me and the rest of the group.

I knew they still didn't trust me and to be honest I didn't trust myself at that moment. Maybe it was the poppies that were still in my system, but I knew better than that.

I conjured up a sleeping bag, and rested against the tree at the far end of the clearing we'd set up camp. My heart hurt for some reason. As if I felt lonely, but I hadn't felt those kind of feelings for so long (I hadn't allowed myself to feel anything other than anger) that I wasn't even sure what I was feeling anymore.

It took me a long time to fall asleep. The pain in my heart about the same as the feeling I'd had when Tinkerbell had squeezed it. I rubbed my finger against my forehead and sighed as the headache seemed to only get worse as I tried to figure out what was going on with me.

When I finally did fall asleep, it was only to dream fitfully, about True Loves, and about the man with the lion tattoo, and then about Henry and Emma, together and happy.

Without me.


	3. Chapter 3

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It took me a moment to realize where I was when I woke up. Long enough for me to feel my heart skip a beat when I heard the voices not too far away, but far enough that I couldn't understand what was being said.

Wiping the sleep out of my eyes and trying to get rid of the strange feelings, I stood and waved my hand to make the sleeping bag disappear.

I wasn't sure if I should join them just yet and I was trying to decide what to do when suddenly, the voices stopped and I heard someone walking toward me.

"Morning, Regina," Emma said as she stopped just beside me. "There's a stream up there if you wanna wash up, and breakfast is almost ready."

I nodded my thanks before I started toward where Emma had pointed, only to realize she was following me. "I'm perfectly capable of doing this by myself, Miss Swan," I forced myself to say while my heart was telling me I would enjoy the company.

"Emma, and I know," she replied with a shrug. "I just figured you didn't want to talk about the dreams with Snow and Charming close by."

I stopped and snapped my eyes toward hers in surprise. "What dreams?"

"I'm not sure, you were mumbling a lot but I heard you call out for Henry once. You sounded like you were in pain." Emma reached out but I took a step back before she could touch me. "I just wanted to know you were okay."

"Well, I am fine," I said as I tried to shield myself for the hurt on her face at my evasion . "Did you...did you sleep okay? I'm assuming you were awake for a time because of my…" I didn't even know what to call it. I'd had more than my share of dreams and nightmares. But I had always been alone so I didn't even know if I ever before made a sound.

"I couldn't sleep. I only heard you because I was walking around, trying to figure out a way to get Henry back." She looked down at her hands then, and showed me the magic swirling in her palms. "I didn't realize how far away you'd gone, and when I heard you, I didn't know what to do so I just kept an eye on you."

"Because I might do something to hurt you?" I asked, trying to keep the anger and the pain out of my voice as I watched the magic in her hands swirl and jump as her emotions seemed to do.

"No. Because I was worried you'd do something to hurt yourself." She really did seem worried but I pushed away everything I felt just to slide the mask back on.

"Well, thank you for your worry but I'm fine." I turned on my heels and made my way to the stream, only realizing I was alone when I glanced around.

I swallowed hard before I steeled myself against my feelings and kneeled down by the water to wash my face.

I realized too late where I was, too late that this was Neverland and nothing was as it seemed.

When the water touched my face, and the feeling of thick blood dripping down my face instead of water hit me, my heart stopped.

Neverland playing with people. Pan played with people and apparently he had chosen me today, to mess with. I rubbed at my face, and then looked at my hands. Willing myself to see the water instead of the blood. But the way the thickness covered my hands and my face, the way that it dripped down my chin and on my jeans, made me feel sick to my stomach.

I gagged as I stood to my feet and stumbled toward the camp, only to get to an empty clearing. How did they break up camp this fast? And more importantly, where did they go?

Why did they leave me behind?

"Emma?" I called, my voice shaking despite the fact that I knew that this was a game someone was playing with me. "Snow? Charming?" I didn't get an answering call.

"They left you Miss Mills," a voice echoed around me as my mouth dried up with the fear I was feeling. "Or should I say, Your Majesty?" It seemed to come from everywhere around me and even though I really wanted to know who was goading me, I also really wanted to know what was going on and why they'd left me behind.

It hurt.

I didn't know why I was letting anything like that get to be. Especially considering before, I'd wanted to go at it alone, use my magic and free Henry.

But that was before. Even though I really didn't know before _what_ exactly.

"You should stop playing your games and show yourself," I gritted out, my stomach hardly strong enough for some reason, to accept the smell of blood and death around me.

He stood in front of me all of a sudden, an evil smirk on his face as he watched me with a strange kind of amusement. "It's been a while, huh? Feeling the blood on your hands?"

I shook my head because I've never actually had blood on my hands but I realized in time what he meant. "Never quite this literal, Pan." I wiped my blood covered hands on my jeans because I looked back at the boy standing in front of me.

I'd never before met Pan, even though I'd heard the stories of him torturing his prisoners with just their own mind. You didn't even have to have a bad past like I had, because your own mind would turn against you if that was all you were left with.

And my past had been filled with blood, torture, pain. All in the name of killing Snow White. And I hadn't even been able to do that before I grew soft.

But, I realized I didn't even want to kill her anymore. She would never be my favorite person but I wouldn't want to hurt her anymore.

All I wanted was happiness and above all else, peace.

"I need you here for a while. Your companions are getting too close to figuring out what they need and this will...keep them occupied while I do what I need to do." His smirk grew and I shivered at the coldness that washed over me, looking at him. "It's going to be a hell of a ride though, Your Majesty. You're going to hurt, you're going to need a while to get over everything that you're going to feel in the next couple of hours, whether it be something real from your past or something imagined from your future."

Before I could say anything he was gone and I wasn't in the woods anymore. I was back in the Enchanted Forest, wearing a dress as I move through the castle. This was before everything in me had turned dark, and as I tried to struggle against the grip it had over my mind I watched how Snow smiled at me, and then turned to her father.

I was back at the beginning of my marriage.


	4. Chapter 4

The memories assaulted my mind, but never seemed to settle long enough to know exactly what happened.

I got dizzy, watching the memories swirl around me like pieces of a puzzle.

The day of the wedding, my tired but filled with fear mind working to accept the fact that I was going to marry a man that was old enough to be my father. And that all only because a child had wanted it. A child who had managed to get my True Love killed just because she wanted me to be in her life. That's where my anger started, I think.

The day I first realized that the king wasn't the sweet and honest man that the country believed him to be when he blindsided me with his anger. This was when I first started believing I was doing something very wrong in life to deserve this.

The day I had the Genie, now known as Sidney, kill the king. His evil smile making me want to throw up as I saw how he had done it. I hadn't been there, so I knew this wasn't a memory but my imagination. Or, Pan's imagination. The blood was slowly flowing out of Leopold's body and onto my hands. I could feel the thick substance returning between my fingers and I bit my lip to stop the cry.

I wanted it to stop.

The day of my first magic lesson with Rumplestiltskin and how he'd pushed me past my limit, and how my feelings were trying to tell me to never do this, to never become dark because it felt oh so wrong. But I did turn dark.

I did.

The first day my heart spasmed and he told me that that was because it was turning dark. There was no turning back now as he showed me my heart, and the first black spot on it. It had surprised me for only a moment before I took what I could to make my heart even darker because what I learnt was, that the moment that black spot appeared on my heart, some of my pain went away.

That's all I wanted, for my pain to go away.

Right after the curse, I woke up with excitement in my dark heart and that was the first time I'd felt anything other than anger and pain. The sky was blue, the town was new and I was just getting started. Knowing that I was the only one that remembered (or so I thought) was keeping me happy as I took a shower and dressed for my first day as Mayor. Which wasn't as easy as I thought it would be, not as easy as being queen and just deciding what happened. But I stayed happy even when I felt like a failure.

Henry, sweet baby Henry as I first held him. He cooed at me and I smiled at him as I held him close to me. I'd never before held something so small and all of a sudden I knew what I had been missing all those years.

Somewhere deep in my mind I could hear someone calling my name. But it was so far away that it was easy to ignore as the memories assaulted me. One after another. Riding Rocinante, kissing Daniel, crying on my bed after my mother had killed him.

They kept on coming and my heart was about to give up when something in the air changed. The thickness disappeared, and in what seemed like ages I could feel my body again.

I looked down at my hands, and didn't see the blood but water.

Suddenly, I was looking at Emma and she was grinning at me. "What are you laughing at?" I asked, but she just kept grinning at me. And then she leaned forward and kissed me, surprising me but somehow, I wasn't able to move away. I didn't want to move away it seemed, as my arms wrapped around her and my body moved with her kiss.

This didn't make any sense, but my mind accepted it as reality even though somewhere deep down, I knew this would never happen. I would never let it happen.

The scene changed again and I was laying down, the soft bed beneath me and a warm body pressed to mine. My brain tried to make sense of the fast shifting visions, tried to figure out if any of it was real or just my imagination.

But I did know this was imagination because when I turned it was Emma's body pressed to mine, and I had no control over my body or face as I felt myself starting to smile and turn into her. "Hmm, morning."

What was happening?

Again, somewhere far away I could hear a voice call out to me and this time it seemed closer, but still I couldn't pull myself out of the whirlwind of memories. Or my imagination. It scared me.

Henry was smiling at me but he was older. I couldn't say, but I think he was old enough to marry, because he was wearing a suit, and I was wearing some kind of dress again but this time not something out of the Enchanted Forest. I held out my hands and he took them, his smile never leaving his face as he asked me if I was ready. I nodded my head and he made a show of offering me his arm before turning and walking me down the aisle. Toward her.

"Regina!"

The frantic voice broke through the scene in my mind and I startled, my entire body tensing up as I fought against the darkness of whatever Pan or Neverland was trying to press upon me.

"Give her a minute Emma, she's coming back I can see it." It was Snow and she was right I could feel the grip slipping on my mind and I was so grateful for it that I could cry.

"It's been hours Snow," Emma said and if I could I would've laughed at the tone I heard. What was it as of late that made me want to react more positive to the things around me?

"And the couple of minutes it takes her to find herself can't hurt," Snow replied and then I heard footsteps.

Someone was breathing close to me and for the first time since I woke up, I opened my eyes. Closing them right away against the brightness I moaned and tried to lift an arm to cover my eyes only to find that someone was holding my hand too.

The feeling in my body returned, and I groaned when my headache made itself known, as well as the various other pains I felt.

"Give me a minute Miss Swan," I whispered as I tried to pull my hand out of hers. It was more out of habit than anything else, considering I didn't even want her to let go of my hand.

"You scared me," Emma said and I slowly opened my eyes again to look at her. She did look like she had been worrying. "Don't ever do that again."

"Do what, succumb to Pan's dark magic?" I asked with a quirk of my eyebrow. She frowned and turned to Snow, who was standing behind her. "Yes, well I will do my best not to let him get to me again."

It took me a while but I sat up gingerly, rubbing the back of my neck as I tried to make sense of my thoughts.

"What happened?" Emma asked but suddenly, my mind shifted and I felt like every puzzle piece fell into place as I looked at her, sitting beside me in the damp grass.

Emma Swan, the child of my ex-stepdaughter and ex-enemy, was my True Love.


	5. Chapter 5

Time seemed to move in a different pace after I had realized that the mother of my son was my True Love.

I tried to deny it the first day. Which was hard because Emma was staying close to me, just walking beside me and offering me help getting over obstacles in the way.

The only reason I accepted her help was because I still felt shaky, the memories unnerving me and bring back more of my past with them.

They set up camp that night and forced me to eat something, even when I told them I wasn't hungry. They kept me close but more importantly, Emma kept me close.

The second day, I was more aware of where we were going and I tried to teach Emma some of the basic magic rules. She was a quick study, being able to light a fire within the first hour of our lessons.

"You need to focus Emma, focus on your anger and...well, light the fire," I said as she stared intently at the campfire, willing it to start burning.

"Why does it have to be dark?" Emma asked frustrated when it didn't work. But then again we'd only been here for a moment, only started trying ten minutes ago.

"Oh, give up this easily why don't you? We'll just leave Henry in Pan's camp huh?" It was the last comment I could see it, the fire was burning and I grinned at Emma. "Smell that?"

"What?" She snapped at me and then, when I pointed toward the fire, she gasped. "I just did that with my mind?" She looked back at me with the surprise written all over her face.

"Yes you did," I said with a smile.

It surprised me when she threw her arms around me and kept thanking me. Which threw me back into my mind wondering how I was going to get over this knowledge of her being my True Love.

"Let's find our son Regina because I'm done walking around and doing nothing." Emma pulled back and smiled at me and all I could do was nod.

The third day, there was a rustle in the trees next to me and I glanced at Emma and the Charmings to see if they had heard it. And because they hadn't, or they didn't show it, I ignored it.

The sound returned ten minutes later and I stopped to listen, gesturing toward Emma as she was about to speak. Again, I heard the rustling and this time Emma did too, her body tensing as she listened with me.

She moved closer to me as I turned toward the sound and then all of a sudden, the fairy jumped out of the bushes and grimaced at us.

"Are you still looking for the boy?" She asked Emma. I was glad that she was ignoring me because I still didn't know what she had done, still didn't know what I felt about the whole situation.

"Yes, we are. And who are you?" Emma asked with raised eyebrows, her eyes roaming over Tink trying to figure it out.

"Isn't that Tinkerbell?" Snow walked back to where we'd stopped and smiled at the fairy before she turned to Emma. "That's Tinkerbell," she told her before turning back to the fairy. "Do you know anything about where they are keeping Henry?"

Tinkerbell shrugged as if to say she didn't care but then she looked at Emma again. "I know Pan, he...he trusts me." A glance at me told me she had sunken lower than I had expected and I looked down at the ground, my chest feeling like my heart was being squeezed.

Was that guilt?

"How is that going to get us our son back?" Emma asked, taking a step toward me and bumping her shoulder into mine. I looked up at her to see her smile toward me, as if she understood even though I didn't even tell her everything.

"I know that he'll let me into the camp, and I could maybe sneak two of you inside too...before they notice," she shrugged and grimaced again. "It would be a suicide mission and you are most likely too late...but it's your choice."

"I think we need to talk about it," David said as he looked at Emma and Snow. "We need to figure out a plan…" he turned to Tinkerbell. "Are we even close to his camp?"

"We are close enough," she said. And then she looked at me, her eyes interested all of a sudden. "Are you feeling any different yet? Is the dust settling in?" She grinned at me before she turned toward Emma again. "I'll be around if you need me, but you probably need to talk about what you want to do."

"No! We don't have to talk about it," Emma said, after looking at me, confused at Tink's question. "And I think we need you in on the planning the getting in and out."

That's how we set up camp in the next clearing, while I made sure I didn't get too close to Tink because I didn't think I'd want to talk to her, even though I did want to know what she had done to my heart.

While Emma and the Charmings worked on the plan with Tink, I tried my hand at making a stew of what we still had in our packs. But no matter how much I tried to avoid the fairy, she didn't seem to want to avoid me.

"I know you don't want to talk to me, but I really do want to know how you are feeling," she said as she rubbed her hand up and down my arm. Normally, my mind was working up ways to get her to stop touching me but for the first time in my life, I wasn't really worried about her touching me. She meant well, I imagined.

"I feel...strange. Different," I said as I thought about the past couple of days. "The thing is, Pan got to me the day after you did so I don't know if it's because of your pixie dust or because of his...playing with my mind." Tinkerbell seemed surprised and I wondered, because she seemed to have found us, how she didn't know about my fight with myself. "How'd you find us?"

Tink turned toward me and sighed as she apparently heard my distrust. Some things didn't change and I still didn't trust everyone around me even though my heart seemed to think there was good in everyone. "Regina, considering I want to help you get your son, is it really important how I found you?"

I looked at her, wondering if her questions was really something that was important to me, and then I nodded. "Actually, yes. You claim you didn't know about my run in with Pan, right?"

"I didn't, I promise," Tink said as she held up her free hand. "I...I realized that I was going to let an innocent boy get in trouble because of my vendetta against you, and it just didn't make sense to me that I would be that...childish." Tink shook her head. "I started looking for you guys...I didn't know you had a run in with Pan, I just knew you'd been looking for a little boy and he needed help."

"Well, then let's get to it shall we?" I said, a smile on my face as I did my best to push past any distrust and listen to my heart.

"Let's."


	6. Chapter 6

_Thanks so much for the follows and faves and the reviews! It really does help me :)_

* * *

Emma joined us and told me what they were planning on doing.

"You and I will get into the camp after...her," she said glancing at Tinkerbell.

"My name is Tinkerbell," Tink said and I grinned at Emma while she grumbled. "Tink is fine too."

"Yea that doesn't make it easier," Emma threw back and turned back to me. "Snow and David will cover us, they have some tricks up their sleeves they say so, I'm counting on them to help us once we're in there."

"Tricks up their sleeves?" I asked, a shiver running up and down my arms as Tinkerbell stood and walked away. "Emma, I'm not sure that this is wise."

"Why not?" She asked as she moved closer to me. "Regina this might be the only chance we've got."

It was like she was pleading with me but I knew that wasn't what she was doing. I was just very much afraid all of a sudden.

"How are we going to get out? How are we going to get away, when this island is Pan's and he knows everything that happens on this godforsaken piece of land?"

Emma grinned, "I told you Snow and David have some tricks on their sleeves and this is one of them. Apparently they have something to bring us back when we get Henry, so I think we just have to trust them."

Even Emma seemed to have some trouble with that and I thought about trusting them for a moment. Sure, I've known Snow for almost her entire life, as Mary Margaret and as Snow White. I knew the hero she was, she wanted to be. David, just the same. He didn't want to be here but he would follow Snow everywhere.

And I knew she wanted to get off this island just as much as the rest of us.

"I am not trusting anyone but myself," I said. Emma opened her mouth to protest and I gently put my hand on her arm, ignoring the sparks I felt in the palm of my hand at the contact. "But I'll put my trust in _you,_ I'll trust you to make the right decision about this."

She glanced up at me again and smiled, her face showing much more than I thought I'd see and I made an effort to smile back. "Good." She stood and held out her hand and before I could think about it I grabbed hold of it and let her pull me up.

"So what's it going to be?" Tink asked, and Emma took the chance to talk about the exit strategy, but my entire body and mind were focused on Emma's hand. Because she was still holding mine and she didn't seem to notice.

But it made my skin tingle and my heart skip beats.

I knew this was only because Tinkerbell had said my True Love was on the island. I knew this was because what Pan had shown me. I also knew that when we got home, she was probably going to keep her distance from me because of who I was.

"So that's a pretty solid plan." I realized way too late that I hadn't heard any of the plan they had made except for the part where Emma and I were risking our lives for our son. The way that all of them, everyone around me nodded their agreement, made me anxious. "We should rest, preserve our energy then."

"I'll tell you in a minute," Emma whispered when she looked at me and probably saw my emotions written on my face.

"I…" I stopped when she squeezed my hand and she smiled at me as she pulled me with her, away from the Charmings and Tink.

"You weren't really paying attention, I take it," Emma said as she sat down. She let go of my hand then and made me wish she hadn't. "It's okay, with everything going on here I have a hard time concentrating on anything other than finding Henry."

"Are you saying-" I started snapping but she shook her head, as if tired of this conversation already and I bit my lip to stop me from saying more.

"I'm saying if I have trouble keeping my head in the game, I can't imagine what you're going through. I didn't expect you to have this much trouble but maybe the way Pan messed with your head has something to do with it."

"I suppose you're right. I will have to stay...present if I want to be able to save Henry, so would you please just tell me the plan so that we can rest?" I asked and Emma simply nodded and patted next to her on the ground, indicating for me to sit down next to her.

"You know about the sneaking in, having help from...her, will help immensely. She'll distract Pan and we can sneak in but then we have those Lost Boys to deal with." Emma shook her head at this and I wondered, what kind of fairy tale was being told about Pan and Neverland and the Lost Ones. I was about to ask when she went on, telling me about the exit plan which was nothing more than relying on the Charmings to get us out with their tricks.

"And we still don't know what kind of tricks?"

"I think they have a bean, or they have something else that might create a portal to some other place." Emma shrugged and turned her head, glancing at the people that were her parents. She still seemed to have a hard time with that knowledge.

"Why aren't they telling us?" I swallowed against the anxious energy and followed Emma's gaze to the people that had caused all my pain.

But I didn't feel any pain and for the first time, I didn't feel anger while looking at them. For the first time I realized that maybe, just maybe they hadn't caused my pain, but I had caused my own pain. And that realization hurt just as much as the anger had always hurt.

"I think...I think it has to do with the fact that he has ears everywhere according to Tinkerbell," Emma said with a grimace and I chuckled at her because turning serious again. "They don't want him to know the plan to get out, because he probably already knows about the plan to get in."

"And...we are going through with it like this? Isn't that the definition of a suicidal plan?" I asked even though I knew this was our only chance to get Henry back before it was too late and Henry stopped believing in them.

"Yes. We are going through with this plan because there no other way." Emma sighed and then turned back to me, her green eyes burning into mine. "I feel like he's starting to lose faith in us and if we don't do it now, we'll lose him."


	7. Chapter 7

The thing about plans was, they usually never worked out the way you'd planned.

So when Tink gestured for Emma and I to get closer to camp, and one of the Lost Ones saw and looked our way, I had to be really quick about throwing up some sort of invisibility shield.

The thing is magic, it was visible to some people. There was just a shimmer or just as you cast the spell, you could see a color associated with the caster.

The Lost One turned and walked away but I knew he had seen us and so now Tink was in danger, as were we.

Emma knew too, I could see it in her eyes as she turned toward me. There was a glitter in her eyes but before I could focus on it, it was gone. "So I was wondering…" she grinned when I pulled back a little, my mask not as tight in place as I'd hoped.

"What?" I asked despite myself. I knew this was something I wouldn't like. I also knew that I made sure no one could see and hear us, and though I wish I hadn't, I really was glad I'd thought of it because otherwise this would have been the death of us for sure.

"You've been...acting out of sorts. And because you're Henry's mother too I was just wondering if there was something wrong? Is there something I can help you with?" She looked genuinely concerned and it surprised me.

Sure, Emma hadn't always liked me and trusted me, but most of the time since the curse was broken, she'd believed that I was trying to be better. And so she had been there for me even when she probably shouldn't have.

Even though her parents probably told her not to be.

"I...I'm fine. I just want to get this over with and hold Henry again," I muttered as I tried to push down on the feelings. The feelings of uncertainty and of unworthiness.

Emma glanced at me again and there was something in her eyes, something I couldn't place. Something that made me feel warm inside and, just a little uncomfortable.

"I know that's not really what's going on here but I'll let it go for now," she said and then turned back to watch the camp. I followed her gaze as I mulled over what she had said, and what I had seen in her eyes just a moment before she shut it down.

"Thanks," I said, my voice dripping with sarcasm before I could stop it. She just smiled and then reached out and took my hand in hers, seemingly not even thinking about it but I knew, without a doubt, that she'd been debating whether or not she should do it.

A shuffle behind us startled me enough to pull my hand back quickly, but neither of us was paying attention to that as we turned to see what was happening.

When there was another shuffle, closer this time, I almost dropped the shield in surprise. "Hold it, Regina," I heard Emma whisper as if she'd seen what had happened.

"I'm trying," I gritted out as I forced myself to focus on the shield instead of the footsteps now, and the shuffling and then, suddenly, I lost my focus when I felt someone brush past me, and the shield dropped.

"Ah, there you are," the voice sounded so young but so very old all at the same time that, when I looked up, I half expected to see an old man standing over me.

But this was Neverland, where no one aged. Where everyone stayed young but anything but sweet. I opened my mouth to reply only to be silenced quickly by a blow to the back of my head, causing me to black out almost immediately.

The last thing I saw was Emma, slumping over, either unconscious or dead.

* * *

When I came to, there was a fire blazing through camp and I panicked, thinking of Henry and how he should've been here.

I didn't hear anything but the fire, crackling as it greedily soaked up everything it could touch. Luckily, my hands weren't tied, but unfortunately I had such a blinding headache I had trouble keeping my eyes open in the light of the fire.

I turned my head, my brain trying to process what I was seeing. Everything was gone.

The Lost Ones that weren't fast enough, had been consumed by the fire.

"Regina?"

Emma.

"Regina? Where are you?" Emma sounded just as panicked as I felt and I knew she had just woken up. Relief flooded my senses when I heard her move about because well, that meant she wasn't dead as I'd thought before I'd passed out.

"Emma," I despised the sound of my voice, so tired and broken. "Emma, I'm right here." I sat up, doing my best to ignore the blinding pain, before waving my hand to clear the smoke right in front of me.

She was so close that our hands almost touched, and when she saw me and I saw her, there was a look of surprise on her face, one that I felt too as I looked at Emma. She was clean, clean of debris and soot.

"I'm...not sure what happened but I…"

"Well, neither am I to be honest," I replied but then I looked down at myself and saw I was just as clean of everything as Emma was. "But I'm guessing even unconscious we both know what to do with our magic."

"Shouldn't you maybe...put the fire out?" Emma asked as she stood to her feet and held out her hand. I glanced up at her face, wondering if she understood what that would take, and I could see that she didn't really.

"I'd need some help," I replied as I grabbed the offered hand and pulled myself up. "We did this together, I'm guessing. I don't...I don't have enough control over my magic yet to do this on my own."

The blazing fire made my skin crawl, because even though it was so close, we both seemed to not even feel the burn of it. We didn't let go, but used the connection of held hands to strengthen us, and our magic, while we tried to put out the fire.

* * *

"What happened there?" Tink asked right after we found her, and the Charmings, frantically trying to figure out what happened and what to do.

I glanced at Emma, and then back at the Charmings to see them looking at our hands, still intertwined. I almost pulled back my hand but then, I realized, they didn't decide what happened in my life.

"Well, considering Regina and I were both spotless when we woke up, we set the fire together," Emma said with a frown before she turned toward me, her hand squeezing mine.

"I'd have to agree with that," I said as I could see she wanted me to say something. "There's only one thing I'm so very terrified of."

Everyone glanced at me, surprise and confusion on their faces before Emma gasped. I nodded sharply when I could see the fear settle in her.

It was the one thing that I'd been asking myself ever since we put out the fire, ever since we could see what our magic had done to the camp we'd been trying to sneak into.

"Henry."


	8. Chapter 8

_I've written this story up to chapter 10, and while that could be an ending it could also be an opening to a sequel. I'm leaning toward sequel but that's because writing in first person is different and not easy when you're writing in third in other stories._

 _Also, check out my other stories ;)_

 _Tell me what you think!_

* * *

"Damn it."

I snapped my eyes toward Emma again and blinked at the anger that overtook the fear. It wasn't something I'd ever seen in the blonde and it made me only a little uncomfortable.

Also, "Emma, you're hurting me." Her hand loosened around mine, an apologetic half smile on her face, but she didn't let go. My hand throbbed, having been so close to something breaking in there because Emma was strong.

"Sorry…but what do we do now?" She asked as she looked around, looking at her parents even though she was hard pressed to admit that they were just that. It was my fault I knew, but I wouldn't say anything about it.

"There's...one other place that Pan likes to go to…" Tink said as she looked at me. I almost snapped, but Emma's hand held me back as she softly, gently squeezed it. "I don't know about any plan other than that he's been talking about a cave not far from here where the magic is...more there."

"Show us the way," I gritted out as I stepped forward, trying to show her how much I wanted my son back. My heart hurt, as it pounded in my chest in fear of losing Henry. "I – we – need to save our son before it's too late!"

"I'm not going to be able to come with you. He knows I'm a traitor now, he'll kill me when he sees me," Tink said with a shake of her head. "I can tell you where it is...I mean, it's not that hard."

"Then do," Emma said as she pulled me back and held my hand a little tighter. "After you tell us what you know, we will find a way to bring you back with us."

I didn't agree but Emma didn't pay me any attention other than her thumb, rubbing over my knuckles.

My mind drifted again – even though I knew I should listen – to how the fairy had shown me more than just anger in my heart and how I was so worried now, so much more so about other things besides Henry. How the fairy had shown me who my True Love was even though I was sure that would never get anywhere.

"Let's go," Emma said as she pulled me with her, her parents following us along a couple of steps behind us. "You really are having trouble concentrating huh?"

I blinked at Emma and sighed. "There's more to the story than just Pan but I'd rather not get into it while we are trying to save our son," I replied, and she rolled her eyes.

At me.

But then she grinned. "So Tink was telling the truth? She blew fairy dust all over your heart?" Emma chuckled and I knew she was trying to come to terms with what was going on.

"Actually...pixie dust, but yes." I gritted my teeth. "It's supposed to show me who my True Love is but it's wrong, once again. I just…"

"Who do you think is your True Love? I hope not my d-David," Emma said with a stutter and a laugh. I smirked at her, glancing back at Charming before looking back ahead of me.

"No." I simply said.

"Snow?" Emma asked softly as she frowned at me. I shook my head again and she tried again, naming people she knew from Storybrooke as if she didn't know what I had done to all those people.

"Stop," I said, my voice betraying my feelings. Feelings of uncertainty as my heart pushed me toward someone so unexpected and probably not even...into me. At least not like that.

Lately I'd seen her look at me in a different way but it felt more like a warm friendship kind of way than anything else.

"I want to know, because you seem out of sorts and not even your snarky self," Emma said with a smile that should have told me she was just teasing me. But she was right and I was out of sorts.

"It's you, okay? Are you happy now, Miss Swan?" I snapped as I pulled my hand out of hers, still walking beside her but trying to put as much distance between us as I could.

Emma didn't say anything. Well, maybe she tried but I closed off, my mind drifting to my other problem. Saving Henry. I needed to focus on that instead of the pain I felt when Emma didn't seem to bother now that she knew what I hadn't wanted her to know.

My heart had changed ever since Tink messed with it and I wish I could go back in time and undo what she did before she did it. But I couldn't and I shouldn't even if I could.

Emma led us to the cave Tink had told us about and the first time she looked at me after my confession showed me we were feeling the same thing, the magic flowing off the cave in thick, sticky waves. It practically choked me and I could see Emma felt the same way.

A glance at the Charmings told me that they were oblivious. "I think you two should remain here," I said as I stepped forward to the cave. I didn't even bother to listen to the protests coming off of them but focused on the energy of the magic.

It was dark, that much I could tell. Dark enough to make my fingers itch because my dark magic was reacting to this.

"She's right you should stay here so that you can open that portal." I heard her say the words before I could feel her sliding up next to me, her body shaking ever so slightly. "Are you ready?"

I looked at her and nodded, not sure what would come out of my mouth if I'd spoken. I wasn't ready because the magic was too dark, and my body was being pulled toward it for a different reason other than to save my son.

We made our way into the cave, not even bothering to be silent because the magic seemed to know we were there. It was trying to lure me into its beautiful trap.

But as if Emma could see the struggle inside of me, she grabbed my hand again, grounding me as I was about to fall for the darkness.

"We need to get out of here as fast as we can," I choked out, almost as if I was being suffocated. All Emma could do was nod, but I could see it wasn't getting to her as much as it was getting to me.

The first thing I saw when we were far enough into the cave, was an alter of sorts. Henry's still body was on top of that alter, Pan's young body standing next to it, his hands on Henry's chest and his eyes on the boy's face.

"The heart of the truest believer will keep me alive," Pan was saying to Henry and even though I knew Henry was a strong and smart boy, it looked like he'd given up and he was nodding as Pan smiled his evil smile. "So give it to me."

"No!" Emma yelled, but Henry didn't hear her. Only Pan did but he acted like he didn't as Henry used one of his own hands, glowing with the green signature of Pan's magic, to reach into his chest as I'd done a couple of days before, and pulled out his heart.

I knew I shouldn't, but even though the darkness was pulling at me from all sides I knew, that once Pan had his heart, there was no going back. They'd truly be too late to save Henry.

"Henry!"


	9. Chapter 9

This whole journey had begun in a way that I had not expected and had made me focus on the wrong things at the wrong time.

The fairy Tinkerbell had pulled my mind toward things that really didn't matter while we were looking for my - our - son, such as True Love and things that I'd gotten really good at to let to.

And then Pan had come and reminded me of a past I'd rather forget but knew I would never be able to. And he had known it because thinking about it I remembered him cackling throughout the whole process.

Nothing had made sense, not my feelings and not my thoughts. The only thing I should've been focused on was Henry and maybe then we'd have found him sooner, or maybe we'd have been able to stay hidden back at the camp.

Standing too far away from Henry in the cave and watching him stare at Pan with adoration, my heart broke and none of what had happened to me mattered. Henry was the only one I wanted around, he was my True Love no matter how much I was craving a different kind.

"Pan," I growled out, and the boy turned toward me with a grin. Good, I needed him distracted from Henry. "Step away from my son."

The magic moved through my body in a dark and sticky way that made my stomach heave. It felt and tasted like the thick sticky blood that had been on my hands in the world Pan had put me in earlier in the week.

"I kind of need him for this next part, Regina," he said as he made his way over to where Emma and I were standing. "You see, in this place the magic is thick." He glanced at me and then smiled again, his intent almost clear. "You feel it don't you, Regina? The darkness calling to yours."

"Regina?" Emma's voice broke through and I turned to her, only seeing her through a haze. I blinked to get my focus back, but it wasn't working as well as I'd hoped.

Emma, always the light in the dark for so many people, faded into the back of my mind even as I could see her start to glow with that white energy of hers, her signature magic color.

Mine, a majestic purple, was clearly rolling off of me as I turned back to Pan. Somewhere through the haze in my brain I knew this was what he wanted, us using magic, but I couldn't stop, I _needed_ to give in to that beautiful darkness.

"It seems, the magic likes you," Pan said and I shook my head to focus again. His face seemed way too young and gleeful.

It made me want to fight and though it made me weaker than I had anticipated, I fought off the dark magic and snapped my eyes to look at Emma. "I'm okay, not going dark on you," I said and even I heard the shaking of my voice.

"Good because look," Emma said, pointing toward where Henry stood. His heart still in his hand and when I paid attention, I could see that he had a golden heart. I knew he was the truest believer but I had never actually seen a heart that wasn't just red, or black, or both.

A golden heart.

"That's the heart of a true believer Emma," Pan said, turning from us to Henry. "That's what I need to survive, to stay around for a couple of centuries more. He doesn't know, he thinks he's saving magic." He chuckled then, a sound that sent shivers down my spine.

"Why though? Don't you...don't you believe?" Emma asked even though I felt like she thought it was a strange question. It was, but it wasn't.

"I believe, but it wears my heart, so I need a new one," Pan said as if he was talking about a pen, something so simple.

I didn't think I should use magic even though what I wanted to do was take Henry out of here, the price be damned. "Emma, I don't think we can use our magic."

"We can, I can feel it, see it roll off of you," Emma said, her tone confused. "What are you saying?"

"If you use magic here...it comes back to you in tenfold. It's...there's too much here and all we'd do is add to it," I replied softly as I moved a little closer to Henry. "I think we don't really have a choice."

She frowned at me, the fear in her eyes clear as I moved even closer to our son. She was trying to figure out what was going on and that was good because Pan had his attention on Emma, not on me.

"She's right Emma. You can't do anything here that doesn't come back to you so if you want to hurt me...the magic around you will do the same only way worse." Pan closed the distance between him and Emma and I took a couple of quick steps toward Henry, who was still staring down at his heart as if he didn't know what to do with it.

"Henry?" I whispered when I felt like I was close enough. His eyes snapped to me and then he frowned.

Normally Henry was very expressive and he could never hide what he was feeling from me. That was something I loved about him even though he hated it because I could see right through him.

At that moment, he showed me a flash of something. Hate. And then there was a wall and every emotion was pushed down except anger.

"You're too late," he growled at me as he moved backward. "You're too late, and I hate you for it!"

The pain that went through me made me want to hurt Pan, made me want to walk away but then I steeled myself, straightened my spine and put on my mother voice.

"You will return your heart Henry, and then you're going to come with me," I said sternly. He simple shook his head and chuckled, while I heard Pan turn around and start toward us.

"Like he said Regina. You're too late. You never wanted him," Pan said and even though it hurt, I realized that this is what he had fed Henry. It had taken us too long but he had used that time to turn Henry against us, telling him we weren't coming.

Emma made her way over to where we were slowly, as if testing her footing in here and I could see the magic in her eyes intensify.

I was about to tell her not to do anything when she grabbed my hand. I felt her magic passing through me and from the look on her face she felt mine too. Hers was very light, and it counteracted my darkness. I could feel the dark magic in the cave curl away from us as we stood, hand in hand.

Pan seemed to realize it too because he turned to us, something much like fear written on his face and swirling in his eyes.

"I think we can use magic, Your Majesty," Emma muttered and before I knew what she was planning, she brought her hands up, taking mine with it as she grinned at Pan.

"Henry, do it now," Pan said just as I said, "Henry, move out of the way."


	10. Chapter 10

The power that surged through me was almost scary as Emma and I focused all of our attention on Pan, not to hurt him, but to restrain him.

I never thought that joining the magic of two different people and well, different colors, would be like this. It was a heady feeling where I wanted more of, but I needed to focus on Henry and Pan and how to get one back from the other.

The blast knocked Pan out of the way just as Henry was about to push his heart into Pan and I breathed out in relief just as I heard Emma do the same. With a glance at Pan, who was unconscious, Emma and I stepped toward Henry and before the boy could protest, I took his heart out of his hands.

"You're going to get in so much trouble once we hug you to death, Kid," Emma said with a smile as she pulled him closer. "Are you okay?"

His eyes jumped from Emma to me and then to Pan and before I knew what was happening, tears started streaming down his face and he looked like he was about to collapse.

"Keep it together for a little while longer Henry," I said, hoping my voice was soothing enough. "We just need to get out of here."

"Let's go then," Emma said before she tried to extract her hand from mine. I held on tight though, my brain trying to figure out what was going on between the dark magic and the magic Emma and I had when we were connected.

"You need to go, I think I need to make sure Pan doesn't follow us," I said even though I wasn't sure I could if Emma let go of my hand. My hand pressed Henry's heart back into his chest gently because I knew how uncomfortable it could be. "Take Henry and go," I added after a moment and then pulled my hand out of her grip and off his chest.

Right away I felt the darkness surrounding me and it was harder to fight this time. Emma and Henry hurried out of the cave, even though I could feel that they rather stay to help or maybe, to stop me.

"Magic always comes with a price," I muttered to myself as I glanced at the boy lying on the ground in front of me. He seemed so small, curled up like he was.

I sighed as the dark energy around me seemed to want to choke the will out of me, the will to fight and even to live.

Before I could get in trouble though, I simply restrained him with a couple of nice – and hard to get out of – cuffs. I didn't bother waiting until he came to, or for the dark magic to do something similar to me.

* * *

As it turned out the Charmings had reason to keep their way off the island from me. Or, from us as I was sure that Emma hadn't known about it either.

The _Jolly Roger_ wasn't what I would say what I'd pick out but it was just as efficient as a portal. It just took a little longer to get home.

Which I wasn't sure was best for me, considering now I had all the time to think about everything that had been going on in my heart, and head.

"Hell of a week huh?"

I looked up from the water around the ship and turned toward Tinkerbell, wondering how she knew I was just about to sink into what had happened.

"Hmm."

"Well, I do know you have some questions. Like, what I whispered into your heart?" She asked, raising one eyebrow. I simply watched her for a moment, before nodding my head. "Well, it's simple really. I told it to be happy."

"That's it," I shook my head at the simplicity, "that's all that happened?"

"Well that and my wish with the pixie dust, which was that you'd realize who your True Love was before the week was over." Tink shrugged and I gritted my teeth.

"Yea, which seems to be kind of hard considering the fact that my True Love seems to also be one of the many who dislike me." I turned back to the ocean and sighed as Tink slided next to me, a smile on her face.

"Not really, but that's not for me to say. I just want you to be happy and well, better than you were." However cryptic she was, I did understand what she meant.

I had been fighting against all the good feelings I had ever had. Expect those involving Henry. He had been all the good I'd let into my heart.

When I looked up, Tink was gone and I breathed out in annoyance. She had a way of leaving me to figure out everything after she crashed through my defenses.

But then there was Emma. The blonde moved slowly around the deck as if she was trying to figure out what to do while she looked at me. I turned back to the ocean again, not wanting to show her anything I felt because I didn't know how she'd react now that we had Henry back.

His recovery would take a while. I knew that, Emma knew that. But as a family we'd help him through it.

"We should talk," Emma said as she finally reached me.

"What about?" I knew I sounded harsh but she didn't seem to care. She took my hand with a sigh and my defenses fell again, and again I was wondering what was going on with me.

"About...about True Love. I-I'm not sure how this all works but I do know that I really don't…" She seemed to struggle more than was necessary so I squeezed her hand to stop her from talking.

"You don't have to say anything about that. I know this shouldn't even be an issue and if I hadn't been so on edge I wouldn't have taken the bait but I did. And I'm sorry to burden you with it."

I really was. Sorry that I burdened Emma with it.

"Well, that's the thing." She said with a soft smile. "I have been thinking about it for some time now that we've been on this thing for a couple hours and I just…" she shrugged. "I don't know what I feel yet, but I do know that I can't remember when I stopped disliking you. It doesn't mean that I can just jump into this but it means that…well, if you're open to it I'd wanna start slow. After having some more time to think maybe?"

I watched as the emotions played across her face, from fear to uncertainty and everything else in between that I'd been feeling about this revelation. And then all I could do was nod.

"Yes, I'd like that."


End file.
